Episode Eleven « All Cleared Up

Act 2At CALISTA’S apartment, JAMIE and CALISTA’S roommate LISA are all sat on the floor in their pyjamas. LISA is smoking a cigarette.
LISA: I’m sorry you had to see that girls, but I never back down from a truth-or-dare dare.
JAMIE: I’m surprised you can still smoke it… considering where it’s just been.
CALISTA: Yeah, I think that’s enough, Lisa. I don’t want you scarring my sister for life.
JAMIE: Not everything you put up there comes out of your ear, does it…?
LISA: No; I tried it with a breadstick one time and it never came out.
JAMIE: Never?!
LISA: Oh; but I’m sure it got digested or something, I mean it was six months ago! Okay, your turn, Jamie.
JAMIE: Um… truth; definitely truth.
LISA: Alright. Have you ever had a religious experience?
JAMIE: Well no, I don’t think I have. But Calista did, didn’t you?
JAMIE: Well almost. Remember when you were fifteen; you thought you had one of those, what do they call it, immaculate conceptions! Turns out you just miscalculated your period.
LISA: Immaculate?!
CALISTA: Yes, being a virgin and all, I thought I had been touched by the hand of God!
LISA: Huh, God’s a paedophile!
JAMIE: I just think Calista got her dates mixed up. I’m gonna go get another drink, anyone want anything?
JAMIE stands up and walks into the kitchen.
LISA: Virgin?!
CALISTA: You say nothing.
LISA: You are so going to hell!
CALISTA holds up her finger to her mouth and points to the kitchen where JAMIE is. The two girls listen and they can hear her on the phone.
JAMIE: I told you were I was… okay then… I can see you tomorrow… alright, bye.
LISA: Who was that?
JAMIE: Oh! It was… my boyfriend.
CALISTA: They just started dating, it’s so cute!
LISA: Is he your first serious boyfriend?
JAMIE: I don’t know, how do you know if it’s serious?
LISA: You don’t know?!
CALISTA: I thought you said you kissed him.
JAMIE: But that doesn’t mean its serious… does it?
LISA: Are you exclusive?
JAMIE: Yeah… I mean nothing’s been said but I assumed–
LISA: No, you never assume. I think you should phone him back and make it clear that you want a serious, exclusive relationship.
JAMIE: I can’t just do that out of the blue.
CALISTA: Yeah and how can she tell if he’s really serious when he says yes?
JAMIE: If he says yes.
LISA: Oh, he’ll say yes.
LISA picks up her car keys from the kitchen counter and walks towards the door.
JAMIE: Where are you going?
LISA: We are taking you to see this…
JAMIE: Brandon.
LISA: Brandon, to find out whether he’s serious or not. And if he’s not…
LISA grabs her coat and walks out of the apartment.
JAMIE: And if he’s not, then what… then what?!
CALISTA: Ooh this is so much fun.
JAMIE: No no no, we can’t! The whole point of this night was that it was supposed to be girls only.
CALISTA: Come on, when was the last time you saw him?
JAMIE: At the dance.
CALISTA: Your Formal?! That was like a week ago; oh we are taking you to see him right now.
CALISTA pushes JAMIE out of the apartment and into the backseat of LISA’S car.
JAMIE: But I’m in my pyjamas!
LISA: Oh they’re fine, and at least you’re still wearing make-up.
CALISTA: Consider this your dare for the night.
JAMIE: Fine, but when we get back I’m daring you two to go over to your neighbours and ask him for a cup of sugar.
CALISTA: You’re really not good at playing this game.
JAMIE: Dressed in only your underwear.
LISA: Big deal; Chris’s seen me in my underwear before… and out of it too!
CALISTA: I cannot leave you alone for five seconds.
LISA: Trust me; Chris could do it in five seconds.
CALISTA shoves LISA who laughs as she tries to steer the car. After a few blocks the sound of sirens behind LISA’S car sounds and JAMIE looks out of the back window.
JAMIE: It’s the police!
CALISTA: What?! We couldn’t’ve been doing more than sixty.
LISA signals as she begins to turn the wheel and pull-over. Suddenly, she makes a sharp turn to the right and speeds down the road.
CALISTA: Lisa, what are you doing?!
LISA: I thought we were going to Brandon’s.
CALISTA: I think the police kinda wanted you to pull-over back there.
LISA: Oh, I’m not pulling over.
CALISTA: But you have to!
LISA: Trust me, we are not pulling over.
CALISTA: Why the hell not?
LISA: Remember when you told me earlier you wanted me to clean up the apartment before you sister arrived?
CALISTA: Yu-huh!
LISA: I figured that meant you wanted me to hide all our stash.
CALISTA’S eyes widen and she giggles nervously.
CALISTA: We don’t have a stash.
CALISTA turns to look at JAMIE.
CALISTA: We don’t take drugs.
LISA: Yeah, well those drugs we don’t take are not in the trunk of this car right now.
CALISTA’S eyes almost pop out of her head.
CALISTA: How far do you suppose the border is?
JAMIE: Calista?!
CALISTA: Just, buckle up, Jamie.
JAMIE grips hold of her seatbelt as the car speeds faster down the road.
LISA: So, kid, you having fun yet?!
JAMIE: I wanna go home!
LISA: Yeah; bet this is the best sleepover you’ve ever had.
JAMIE: Sure, I’m used to seeing this happen all the time on The Sleepover Club!