Episode Six « The Caliente Affairs

Act 5: Smashing Pumpkins

Jennifer sighed, looking from her sugar-fuelled child towards her husband. “Could you please go get your daughter, before she ends up breaking something?” She said, frowning at Lucy trying to reach the cat statue.

“Come on, sweetie.” John said, as he picked Lucy up from the sofa.
“But… aww… I want to pet the kitty.” She yawned, coming down from her sugar rush. Lucy rubbed her eyes, as John put her on the floor.
“You know it’s not a real cat, don’t you?” Lucy nodded. “I know where there’s some real fish, do you want to go and see them?” Lucy shook her head and began to shut her eyes.

“Looks like someone’s had enough for the night.” Mary-Sue watched John and Lucy together.
“More like, had enough for the year!” Jennifer replied, as she too yawned.
“I was referring to your daughter.”
“Huh? Oh, right. Well, you know kids… Enter some generic comment here!” Jennifer laughed. Mary-Sue was once again caught off-guard by the family’s weird sense of humour.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I get the feeling you don’t want any more children.”
“Look, Sue, there’s a reason I turned away a job in paediatrics – kids are just… not for me. I plan to be way too busy in the future to be raising another.” Mary-Sue stared at Jennifer, trying to understand her. She would rather put her work before her children. But before she could pass comment, she suddenly realised who Jennifer reminded her of – it was herself.

Lilith frowned, as her sister sat down to join her. “What are you doing here, I thought Dustin wanted to talk to me?” Angela joined Lilith on the bench.

“I asked him to tell you that so I could get you out here alone.”
“Why do you wanna talk to me?” Lilith said coldly.
“I needed to tell you something, something that you’re not gonna like hearing.” Angela tiptoed around the issue.
“Well then, forgive me for not sticking around to hear it.” Lilith got ready to go inside.
“Wait! I won’t beat around the bush, I’m just gonna tell you.”

“Dirk’s cheating on you.” Lilith didn’t even flinch, as Angela told her sister what she had seen at the Halloween Party. There was only silence coming from Lilith – an unsettling silence.

“Didn’t you hear me? I said your boyfriend’s cheating on you.” Lilith kept on looking into the distance.
“Can you please go get Dirk. I’d like to greet my boyfriend.” Angela got up in a huff.
“Fine, don’t believe me. I was only, God forbid, trying to do something nice for you.” Angela went inside to fetch Dirk, as Lilith thought about her relationship with Dirk. She knew Angela wouldn’t lie, it wasn’t her kind of revenge. She also knew that Dirk was capable of cheating, seeing as how they’d been spending zero amount of time together since she got a job with Dustin. And then, there was her own lingering attraction towards the idea of being with another boy. In fact, now she came to think of it, Lilith was having a hard time remembering what had attracted her to Dirk in the first place. Before she could come up with an answer, Dirk came out of the hall. She looked up at him, and realised the answer was in plain sight.

“Hey!” Lilith got up and threw her arms around Dirk. She caressed his toned body and remembered why she had fallen for him – he was a hottie! But… that was all. There was no substance to their relationship, and she wanted something more. Something she’d never be able to find with Dirk.
“Wow, blonde hair! You look hot.” Dirk went into kiss Lilith, but she backed off.

“Is that all you ever think about? Looks? You know, Dirk, you may be an A-plus student at school, but when it comes to relationships, you get a big fat F!”
“Whoa! Learn to take a compliment.” Dirk stepped back.
“Oh learning! Okay, let’s talk about learning for a second. Lesson number one, don’t cheat on your girlfriend in public.” Dirk’s mouth opened in shock. “Lesson number two, especially when it’s at a party hosted by that girlfriend’s MOTHER!”

“Whoa, who… who says I was cheating? If anyone’s guilty here, it’s you. You said you weren’t coming.”
“Oh! I’m sorry, I’ll make sure I stick to my plans next time, so you and your whore aren’t disturbed.” Lilith raged.

Dirk couldn’t believe it, his longest ever relationship was coming to an end. “You’re not gonna let a little thing like one girl break us up, are you?” Dirk said, knowing full well he had more than one girl.
“Oh, of course not. I just wanted to get it out in the open so we can kiss and make-up… is what I would have said, if I’d had my BRAIN REMOVED!” Lilith couldn’t help laughing to herself, She wanted to put Dirk off the idea of serious relationships as much as humanly possible. She thought of it as her gift to all the girls of Pleasantview! “Lesson number three: TV Guide is an excellent place to look to find out what’s on television. You’ll want to know that, because you’ll be going out on a lot less dates from now on – try ZERO!” Lilith was so caught up in the moment, she almost forgot to officially announce the break-up. She held open the door to the hall and yelled. “Dirk Dreamer, you are officially dumped because you cheated on me!” Dirk peeked inside to see everyone staring in their direction.

Lilith crept up behind her sister, as she admired the Halloween decorations whilst everyone was leaving. “…Don’t know if you heard, but me and Dirk split up.”
“I think even the people in Veronaville heard you!” Angela joked.
“Thank you.” Lilith said to her sister.

“Or, whatever it is you say in these kinds of situations.” Lilith quickly added, turning away from Angela.
“I wouldn’t know, and I hope I never have to find out!” Angela replied.
“Well, don’t think this means I’m gonna be nice to you from now on. I mean, you may have better taste in men than me, but you still stink when it comes to music.” Angela laughed. “And clothes, and make-up, and food – well, I guess you’re okay with food.” Lilith said, knowing how much Angela liked to cook.
“Wow, you’re actually good at being nice!”
“I know, I’m so ashamed!” They both laughed at the same time, revealing a little bit of their sisterly bond. “Anyway, you know what this means now?” Angela shook her head.

“I’m hot and single and looking for love, yee-haw!” Lilith yelped. Angela looked at her sister, knowing that this was beginning of a whole new adventure for them!